Hello again!! Another week has come and gone!!
After writing that greeting, I wonder why I have not come up with something more insightful or attention grabbing for the first line by this point. It’s not like I haven’t had plenty of time to experiment, since one year of posts is approaching. Yay for my forty third post!!
Additionally, I wonder if I could even change it, since the majority have begun in this same lackluster way. I deliberately start all my videos with consistent phrases, so maybe I should embrace this entrance all the same.
Starting in such a boring way is a product of trying to get my readers to the substantive portion of my message as quickly as possible. For one, this is where I spend my effort anyway. Also, I recognize I am writing a blog in the age of streaming services, social media, and bit-sized videos shoved at you through an algorithm precisely tuned to keep you hooked. Attention spans are short.
Despite these challenges, I continue to deliver my message through this medium, including the ancillary steps of updating my website, recording a video, then posting to social media. Some weeks it feels difficult, while others less so.
Regardless, I love it! I am seeking my dream in front of the world, hopefully inspiring everyone else to do the same!
Candidly, this is not a long held dream, just as much of my life is relatively new. While sitting here in this library, wearing a dress, pink and blue hair and sparkly makeup, even my name, all were inconceivable only a few years ago. Yet my smile is never bigger, nor is the love in my heart for myself.
The fact my whole life was inconceivable not long ago fuels my passion to reach this dream of being a writer that started….well…one year ago.
Last September 2nd, I took PTO from my day job just to write, during which I quickly found that I was lost. I mean, I found the Panera near my apartment, found my coffee and a table just fine; however, I sat there not knowing what was next.
So I wondered if I knew what I was thinking.
The answer was no, I didn’t know what I was thinking, but that’s okay.
What I did know is to document the day with a selfie, which has become a consistent tradition, up through here at this library, along with countless times between these endpoints. Inevitably, it will happen again soon! The accumulation of selfies serve several purposes, such as posting to social media or my website.
More importantly, these are memories that I am living in the moment, before time affords me the opportunity for nostalgia. One year ago, I knew the moment was special, giving myself the title of writer, which is printed on business cars being shipped via postal service to my home this week.
That moment was made special for me, this 2023 me, writing these words, who is continuing the dream started by Hazel one year ago. I am curious if I can find what I wrote back then, so just a moment.
Found it!
That Hazel was writing pen on paper, working through an instructional writing book checked out from the library. I have this binder here, so let me share my first writing prompt, which was “I write because…” These are my actual words minus superfluous portions:
I write because I want the world to know me, hear me, and learn from me.
[…]
I write because I will teach people something important – how to value oneself above all else. How this valuing of yourself comes from loving yourself, your thoughts, feelings, how you look, and cherish your hopes and dreams. I can teach others to love yourself above/before anything else.
[…]
Hazel, read and reread this when this feels hard. When giving up seems attractive, when another opportunity seems great. This is your next step in your transition 😀
Hazel, the writer! Love you!
I have so many thoughts right now. Maybe some tears too….
I will be honest, I didn’t think I would pull out this binder when I first started writing this post. In fact, I am not sure the last time I read this, since I’ve actually forgotten about it since moments ago. Thankfully, it’s perfect for this post! You rock Hazel from one year ago!
Remarkably, these words resonate with me more today than they probably did back then, because it’s less about “will” or “want to,” rather I am doing this, and I want to keep going.
My original intent of this post was about capturing today in the way we will remember it in the future. One year ago was the first time I called myself a writer, which was significant in that defining my dreams made them possible.
Having memories from that day make today’s version of Hazel more real, because having memories is a legacy greater than today. By extension, I have more than two years of memories as Hazel, deepening the existence of who I am.
I will strive to live each day expecting to build a fond memory that a future version of me will be grateful for. We hold indisputable power for our future selves right now!
Consequently, I am making an announcement today that I plan to monetize my writing! I have several ideas, one of which is helping other business owners write content, such as a blog, for their own websites. Anyone you know who needs this, please pass along my info!!
As always, I continue to push forward on my book! I passed 40k words this week!! I love every opportunity I have to make progress!!
Ultimately, my goal is to quit my day job, pursuing this full time, which means possibly unstable income. I am scared! These are words I rarely admit; however, I am confident Hazel in twelve months from now will think about the memory of today’s version with gratitude and joy.
I am confident of this, because this is how I think about Hazel from twelve months ago, who graciously reminds me
Hazel, read and reread this when this feels hard. When giving up seems attractive, when another opportunity seems great. This is your next step in your transition 😀
Hazel, the writer! Love you!
Make the memory of today one at which a future version of you smiles. This power is harnessed within you right now! I believe in you!!
Now go do it!! Have a wonderful week!!
