Hello again!! It’s another week in June!! I love summer!!
I also love technology! I am starting this post poolside through a hotspot on my phone, while lounging on a deck chair, head on a pillow and laptop on my lap. The revitalizing heat and sun, my elixir for a long week! No better way to spend a Friday night, right?
Of course, I had to take a few pics first! Despite believing I could lose a pound or two, I love my body…now! Indescribably pleased with my look!
Perhaps vanity is a feature of who I am now, which I embrace, as my body becomes the body I always wanted. In fact, I will periodically forget how I used to look. It’s insane to see old pictures unable to recognize that person!
It’s an insanely fantastic feeling!!
This week, I wanted to focus on more practical concepts, as my swimsuit pics get posted to social media, accumulating likes….thank you all!!! Sunday morning’s update is this pic had more attention than any I recall posting.
All bodies are beautiful! Including yours!! Mine! Everyone’s! Let’s celebrate them all!!
When we look at or talk about the bodies of trans people, it’s important to remember to treat us as everyone else. Honestly, this goes with anything, but for some reason, the body conversation has the perception of wider acceptability for trans bodies.
For example, I regularly receive questions or comments I doubt are being asked to cis women, which in some contexts are okay; however most are not. I will invite questions, through offering one piece of information, such as when I started hormones, then let the conversation flow. I evaluate the person, context, and environment when offering my invitation.
There is no open invitation to ask about my body.
Nevertheless, it’s understandable to wonder!! People constantly tell me I am the closest out trans person in their life, thus I expect questions!
I’m not shy, so here’s a little bit more for everyone!!
First, there is no medical transition requirement to be trans! When I first told people about transitioning, often the first question back was about surgery. What about my name, my joy, my plan or my courage to be myself? Those are secondary to what’s between my legs for some reason.
Most of you will never see that part of my body, so worry a little less about it!
Secondly, for those who are curious, I started hormones in October 2021, after socially transitioning, which is backwards from many people. My reason was my excitement to use my name, as it represented how I wanted the world to see me. Alternatively, hormones require doctor visits, blood work, and an education process I had to work through. While not overly onerous for me, it did take time and effort.
Furthermore, HORMONES ARE AMAZING!!!! Seriously!!
I feel like me, which I love!! The person you read, see, talk to, generally experience in my personality, enthusiasm, emotions, are this combination of estrogen and testosterone flowing through my body at that very moment. I’ve searched for satisfactory descriptors for my experience, yet I continuously revert to, I simply feel perfectly myself.
While it certainly impacts my mood, such as how easily I can cry, hormones have physically changed my body. I see it in my face, my reduced body hair, my chest (raise eyebrows), even my hips. When I notice these, I fall more intensely infatuated with the woman I am, which is the reason I want changes. We often call these second puberty, as my body undergoes the changes I wanted in my teens.
Hormones, also called HRT for Hormone Replacement Therapy, are incredibly important, so when we say, gender affirming care saves lives, this is part of it. The politicians banning gender affirming care want to harm us while adding no benefit to anyone else. Think about it, do my hormones negatively impact anyone?
Regarding puberty blockers, since I was an adult, these were never considered; although, I have educated myself on them to a certain extent. First, these are 100% safe, and actually have been prescribed for decades beyond the need for trans kids. I learned about “precocious puberty” which is when puberty symptoms present in kids as young as three, having potential long-term impacts.
Since I went through the wrong puberty, I am dealing with the changes in my body, many of which I am trying to reverse, such as voice training and laser hair removal. Puberty blockers would have been beneficial, but rather than worry about what I didn’t get, I am incredibly thankful for what my hormones give me!
Surgery! Let’s go here! I do have surgery planned, and I am very excited! Currently, my privilege allows for the possibility for surgery, and I am thankful for the opportunity. If I couldn’t do surgery, that doesn’t make me less happy or less trans, rather it’s simply what it is!
The reason I am doing surgery is because parts of my body do not allow me to live the life I want. First, I will absolutely be wearing an even skimpier swimsuit next summer! The swimsuit I wear is how I feel most comfortable presenting at the pool, specifically in regards to containing certain parts of my body.
Secondly, when I see certain parts of my body, I am less happy. I will put it this way, I like my body in a swimsuit more than when I wear nothing. It bothers me. Moreover, part of my self-consciousness in dating is attributable to this dysphoria, as it can become a safety issue if someone feels I am deceptive.
That’s where the term “Trap” comes from, which is offensive by the way.
Bottom line, surgery will bring me unobtainable aspects into my life, as opposed to fixing my body. I said it before, my body is not broken or wrong; instead, it’s just not what I want.
Now that I have shared, please remember no one else has to. Essentially, if you are included in the medical discussions for someone, then it is relevant; until then, it’s not yours to know.
Finally, I challenge everyone to reconsider what Gender Affirming Care is by widening the concept to any medical intervention supporting how your gender is seen. I know cis women who take the exact hormones I take. Additionally, breast augmentation is hardly a trans surgery, right?
We all want our bodies to make us happy! I want all the happiness and joy for you every single day! Love yourself!! You deserve it!!
Have a wonderful week!!