Let me begin this week’s post with an admission or two. First, while I sit in front of my keyboard on a dateless Saturday evening, I am only slightly sure of the direction I want to go this week. Secondly, I am okay with that. Third, I need to come up with something good pretty soon. Bonus admission: I am not sure if number two is truly an admission. Finally, I will move on.
Truth be told, I actually had a plan for this week months ago. In fact, this week was going to be my debut week, starting out on fire with a series on goal setting, which will be fantastic, so please stay tuned! I targeted this first week of December specifically, since I planned to use three to four weeks, which put us right up against the New Year’s resolution season. Perfect, right?
.So Hazel, what changed?
Well Reader, great question!
I started my blog early, mostly on a whim, and I have yet to release my goal setting series. Obviously, far from my original plan. Secondly, I am okay with that.
It is hard to pinpoint that whim that pushed me to start my blog early. On one hand, I finished my website more quickly than expected, thanks to several dateless weekend nights sitting right here. Oh, also I found a very helpful video from the YouTube, which is beside the point.
On the other hand, I wasn’t sure I was ready to commit to this weekly assignment, nor was I sure I was capable of producing an entertaining post once, let alone multiple times. Clearly, I am still waiting for that first entertaining post, but thank you for sticking with me! I wonder which will be first, the end to my dateless Saturday night streak or an entertaining post….gambling is legal in Kansas now, so place your bets.
The reality is, the whim I felt was mostly the absence of any good reason not to. Secondly, I am okay with that.
When people tell me about an upcoming situation that is producing them stress or anxiety, my suggestion is always: don’t think about anything other than your first move. In whole, situations can easily become overwhelming, but in small increments, we can handle almost anything. Rather than worrying about an entire room of people you don’t know, focus on that first introduction. Rather than worrying about a first date going well, focus on that first hello.
My assertion is building even a little bit of confidence can carry someone the rest of the way. Try it!
While this specific thought didn’t cross my mind, it has generally become my approach to situations I am nervous about. Don’t forget, I wrote about fear early on, because I truly felt it; consequently, I turned it into the topic of my first post. Since then, I have developed the confidence to talk about my blog and writing when people ask me about work. Sure, I tell them I have a boring nine to five to pay the bills, but this is my passion.
What is absolutely crazy is how new this feeling is for me! It was less than two years ago when I had barely a tiny fraction of this confidence, then my life completely changed. In front of me was this incredibly daunting task, riddled with nervous, scary moments; however, behind me was a place I could never return. With this dilemma, I had no choice but to go forward; hence the development of my suggestion above, along with many hours in front of the bathroom mirror telling myself I can do it. I had to do it.
.Of course, I am referring to my transition, specifically the many firsts I had, such as wearing my clothes out, shopping for my clothes, and I even remember the first time I introduced myself as Hazel to a stranger. Oh yeah, there was the first time I used a public bathroom too. Sure, these are second nature for me now, but I was nervous about every one; thus I broke down my process into two steps: the very first steps/words/whatever and the rest.
Many of these firsts I still remember, because it’s fun to think about how far I’ve come, but it’s also a reminder I can achieve what I set out to do. When I want something, I am capable of getting it.
I believe we all have this capability in us. I don’t mean transitioning per se. Rather, finding in yourself what will give you the confidence to reach your goals, talk to that stranger, ask for that promotion, or whatever it is you want next.
I believe in you! You should believe in you too!
circling back, I like how this post turned out. I wanted something to set up next week, which is finally when my goal setting series commences. While you wait for that to drop, think back to those times where you overcame a difficult situation. What tool or tools did you use to get over any hurdles that stood in front of you? Do you think you can take my suggestion above?
On the flip side, think about times you didn’t take an opportunity, perhaps regretting it later on. What stopped you? Is there something you wish someone said or you knew?
I know of opportunities I wish I had taken. Secondly, I am okay with that.
Have an amazing week everyone!!!
You amaze me, Hazel! I’m so genuinely proud to be your sister. I enjoy reading your writings very much. I’m positive your dateless Saturdays will come to an end soon enough. The confidence you are gaining through this process will attract the right person soon enough. I love you very much. Kim